Friday, December 30, 2011

One Heart

Sitting on a park bench by myself,
I see the empty space on the end,
I turn my head slowly, eyes lowering,
Wishing for someone I could confide in.
Deserted and lonely and tired,
I sit with hands clasped slightly,
There’s no one here to help,
To hold my hand tightly.
A sea of overwhelming thoughts,
A flood of loneliness and fears,
No way to fight it, no way to stop it,
Nothing to do but let out the tears.
I stare down at my clasped hands,
A pair, complete, two whole things,
Two eyes, two ears, two feet,
One heart; and what joy that brings.
One heart, alone, as always,
Will there ever be an end,
To the pain, the suffering,
The heart ache that it sends?
The everlasting journey,
To find my other heart,
To fill the seat beside me,
Without falling apart?
My hands tightly clasped,
Eyes lowered to the ground,
Another day passes,
Without my heart being found.


Thursday, November 3, 2011

Deceiving Myself

I'm pulling a blind over my eyes,
Hiding quietly from myself,
Never expressing my true feelings,
Ignoring any queries about my health,
I'm lying to my face,
A blank mask in the form of a wall,
There's a pounding against my shield,
Something determined to make it fall,
I'm lying for my heart,
I'm lying in my head,
I'm lying silently,
As I'm filled full of dread,
Where do the lies end,
And reality begin?
Where is the line drawn?
When does it become a sin?
Do people see right through me?
Past the thick mask I've created?
Is it only a matter of time,
Before it's obliterated?
So, when will it crumble?
When will it fail?
When will my lies be discovered,
And what will it entail?
Still, I pull the blind fast over my eyes,
Hiding still more from myself, 
I blot out my emotions, betray my feelings,
Stack them away on a hidden shelf.


Saturday, October 22, 2011

Where Did the Hours Go?

You’re so cold, so invariably cold,
You’re tired of disappointment,
Tired of feeling lost without a hope,
Doesn’t anyone understand?
You’re so lonely, so horribly lonely,
You’ve wasted so much of your time,
Time you wish you’d never given,
Oh how you wish you could take it all back.
You feel sick, so incurably sick,
Your stomach twisting painfully,
Everything reminds you vividly of them,
Why would God play this cruel trick?
You’re so sad, so terribly sad,
You wish you could feel happy,
Where did all the hours go?
You miss the time when you were whole.


Friday, October 14, 2011

What if?

What if I like you so much I'm afraid to pray?
Because I'm afraid my answer will be different from His.
What if I like you so much that I want you here to stay?
Because you understand me, you love me, you don't play silly tricks.
What if I'm too attached to let you go?
What will I do when you finally move on?
I don't want to learn, don't want to grow,
From a pain that will last, a pain that's so wrong.
I feel too much too soon for anyone who cares,
I plug my ears to block out the sound,
Somebody save me from this fresh bout of tears,
But sadly, as always, he's the only one around.



I hate that feeling when my stomach falls again.
I knew it would happen, but I hoped it wouldn’t be him.
Why is my mind mixed up with so many things?
It’s all there, but it’s him who I see.
He sits there and looks at me, a growing pleasure,
Of torturing, you know I’ll never know for sure.
What does he actually think of me inside his head?
Does he know how I’ve felt, what I did?
How I sacrificed so much to talk to him?
How I kept his secrets, his passions, his fibs?
I'm too close, too confused to make a guess,
So maybe I should step back to see the rest.


Saturday, September 10, 2011

Kind of Depressed

I’m hollow. Carved out. No emotion except sadness left behind.
I’m empty. Alone. I want to find that one person who will be mine.
But how can I? I’m so young. That wish can’t come true.
I need to get my mind off him, but it’s something I can’t seem to do.
I always feel so inadequate, and argue with my friends,
About unimportant things, like looks, that always seems to offend.
It’s not my intention; I just can’t seem to express myself,
They don’t seem to understand; I could be jeopardizing my health,
Okay, that’s not true. Crying never hurt anyone,
And that’s all I do; hide in a corner, cry, and avoid having fun,
Because it’s not really fun; not when I’m always so low,
Excuse this poem; it just helps my feelings flow,
Unending sorrow; that’s not the right explanation,
Feels like there’s no tomorrow; this isn’t the right description.
Sometimes I just feel like crying and staying in bed,
“Life sucks” and “love stinks”, both things the world said.
How that applies to now, you figure it out,
I just feel so insecure, so much doubt.
People pressure me a lot, and I can’t make decisions,
I’m always so impulsive and quick in my conclusions.
They lead to things I don’t like and bad situations,
Like Romeo, and Chelsea, and bad inspirations.
I’d explain, but I’m ashamed. I feel alone, but I know I’m not,
I’m not ugly, I’m rather vain. Its just attention I’ve sought.
Some pictures I really don’t like, and hate when others do,
Because they think I hate myself, which I try to say isn’t true.
But then I’m laughed at and called….well, vain.
And that kind of thing drives me insane.
I hate being dismissed with words like “duh” and “whatever”,
It makes me feel like lying in bed, frozen, forever.
So this is all. And I’ve finally confessed.
As you can see, I’m kind of depressed.


Friday, August 26, 2011


Do you hate me? Do you want me to go away?
Do you love me? Do you want me to stay?
Cuz I dunno what’s going on with you,
But I’m trying to move on, that’s your cue,
Step up, act like a man, raise your chin,
Let me shake your hand, let’s part as friends,
Trust me when I explain, I really liked you,
I wish we could’ve worked, but it wasn’t true,
I made a promise to myself and to God,
And I am trying my best to hold to the Iron Rod,
Stop enticing me, leave my head alone,
I know you don't mean to, but you make me feel so alone,
And you make me feel bad, because everyone says I was a jerk,
But I'm not ready for love, all I meant was to flirt,
And you scared me, don't you understand me by now?
But you're gone, you forgot, it doesn't matter how.

Saturday, July 30, 2011


Stinky, cold, wet, dirty,
Staying up until 10:30,
Slimy, nasty, icky, gross,
Feel like washing in a hose,
Is there a hose? Not right here,
The wind is blowing, the sky's not clear,
My hair is tangled and full of dirt,
Pulling a brush through it hurts.
Fishing stinks, fishing's stupid,
And my appearance does nothing to help Cupid.
Wish I was home, wish I could take a shower,
Wish for some other food, I'm feeling kind of sour.
Time is passing slowly, I'm falling asleep,
Next moment I'm in the water, feeling like I should weep.
Or maybe it's could...I would, too,
But there's people around, so there's nothing I can do.
Stinky, cold, wet, dirty-
Is that a cute guy getting flirty?
Fun times, good times, happy as can be,
I'm dip-netting, fishing, clear skies (as far as I can see).

Friday, July 15, 2011

Self Confidence

The fog is closing in,
Blocking out the light,
My confidence is dim,
I feel lost, without my sight.
It’s hard to make decisions,
When you’re bombarded constantly,
With everyone’s opinions,
But how they see is not for me.
Sometimes I lose my patience,
And that causes some repercussions,
I lose what respect I used to have,
But you know I've gained self confidence.
I’ve learned to be myself,
And to ignore the many insults,
I’m comfortable as me (sort of),
And I’m happy with the results.


Thursday, July 14, 2011

Mr. Right

Love hurts, even if it isn't true,
Sometimes they say they're in love,
But later you realize, not with you,
But you can't begin holding a grudge,
You've got to move on and find someone better,
You're one of a kind, unique, embrace it,
If they don't see that, don't be sending them letters,
They're not worth it, you have to face it.
Believe me when I say, I know what you're going through,
And I know how hard it is to let them go,
Sometimes it seems they don’t have a clue,
And you can’t help thinking “they should know”,
But you’re still young yet,
Still naïve in the ways of life,
And sometimes we like to forget,
And cause ourselves grief and strife,
Please don’t make yourself unhappy,
Please forget about him and be who you are,
Move on, live your life, smile and be happy,
Do this and you know you’ll go far,
Have faith and be strong,
Pray to God each day and night,
And you know it won’t take too long,
For Him to send you Mr. Right.


Friday, June 3, 2011


Friends who make me feel guilty for things that are in the past,
People who make me so angry I feel like I’ll explode with a blast.
Sometimes life is just too crazy for me to understand why,
I just have to sit down for a while so I don’t start to cry.
Sometimes I wonder why God sends me these little *cough* big trials,
Things that I really don’t want to face, that make me go the extra miles,
Broken hearts, broken glass, burns from the oven and pins on the floor,
Unexpected pain, unknown hurt, all things that will help us through that door,
That’ll lead us to our perfect lives, our soul mates, and Him,
So I think, don’t give up, even if the light at the end of the tunnel is dim,
People tell me “Your friends are invaluable. Treasure them. Remember, life is good.
Be who you are, and who you want to be. Be the little engine that could.”
And I’ve chosen to believe it, to embrace it, to live it. Like I said to Mr. Brown:
“Live life to the fullest. Love with all your heart. And laugh until the tears come streaming down.”


Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Picture that Poem

A friend of mine put my poems on a couple pictures she took, and I thought they looked really cool and were worth sharing.

(Helpful hint: Click on the title of the poem to read the poem, click on the picture to see the full size picture ;)

Look for her pictures at


Monday, May 30, 2011


I stare into the mirror almost 24/7,
Examining my face, my eyes, my hair,
I wasn’t self-conscious til the year I turned eleven,
Now when I see myself I think “it isn’t fair”.
“I’m not as pretty as the other girls”,
“I’m not skinny enough”,
No matter how perfectly my hair curls,
I’ve still got it rough,
My nose is too big, my eyes are too small,
My face is blotchy and I’ve got zits on my hairline,
I wish I had a wig, I wish I wasn’t tall,
When I ask how I look, everyone says “fine”.
But I don’t want fine, I don’t want plain,
I want to shine, not hide in shame.
I wish my eyes weren't muddy brown,
I wish they'd make people think how brightly they gleam,
I wish that when I look in the mirror I wouldn't frown,
I wish that none of me was really as it seems.
Am I being selfish? Shallow? …naive?
How sad it makes me you couldn't believe.
Who am I? Why am I here? I'm not pretty, I'm not cute,
I am sure as anything not gorgeous, these compliments are mute.
Maybe in time...I'll learn to cope,
Maybe in time...that's what I hope.


Sunday, May 29, 2011

Simple Things

"Be grateful for the simple things",
That’s what they always say,
But until a couple days ago,
I didn’t really appreciate.
What things I have this day and age,
How little I have to deal with,
But something has changed inside me,
I know now that life is a gift.
The thought of the work those pioneers did,
Makes me want to cry,
The thought of those who died for freedom,
Always makes me sigh.
A two week old who died of cold,
No shelter or enclosure,
An 11 year old boy protecting his brother,
Died of over exposure.
Imagine all the struggles they had,
Imagine what they did,
How they crossed the plains with pride,
They survived because they didn’t quit.
I’m grateful for all the little things,
And the Pioneers won’t die in vain,
They accomplished what God asked of them,
And their memory will always remain.


Friday, May 13, 2011

Perfect Fit

You’re scared, and you know it,
You’re acting a fool, and you show it,
You’re heart has been snatched up,
And now’s not the time to give up.
You’ve got to go for the win,
You’ve got a chance, however slim.
Being apart isn’t good for your health,
Do what others didn’t, believe in yourself,
You and him are perfect together,
You can talk about anything, including the weather.
Sometimes fighting is hard, but it only makes you stronger,
However much you fight, you know you’ll hold longer.
Be the example for those who lose hope,
Don’t give up, even if you’re on a downward slope,
I want to cry because you guys are losing,
Please don’t give up, look at the path you’re choosing,
You know you can do it, and so do I,
You can make this work, or better, you can make it FLY.


Monday, May 2, 2011

We Broke Up

You WHAT?!
You idiot, you blockhead, you pile of trash,
You carcass face, you nasal face, I’ll burn you in a flash,
Go thou and fill another room in hell,
Go bang your head inside a bell!
Point your feet where thou and mine shall henceforth never meet!
I hope you go into a crowded room and can’t find a seat!
I’ll boil you in oil, castor oil! Savory brew, boyface stew!
You dull worm, you slime face, you thin faced knave!
From her hands her heart she willingly gave!
You abomination to mankind, you odd ball, you creep!
Watch out, I’ll cut your throat when you sleep!
Die horrid monster! Die crooked fool!
You dishonorable boy, you freak, that was uncool!
What’s that you say? It was a joke?
You weirdy, *poke*


Thursday, April 28, 2011

Will You Hurt My Heart?

So young and innocent, still small and naive,
Dreaming of a Prince Charming who’ll sweep her off her feet
Drawing hearts on paper with boy’s names scribbled there,
With a hope in her heart as she combs her hair,
She’s growing older, I find it weird,
It used to be monsters in the closet were all that she feared,
Now, I find papers strewn across the floor, torn apart,
They have words scribbled on them “Will you hurt my heart?”
Time passes quickly, and I better embrace it,
Spend more time with her, shelter her, but I’ve got to face it,
She’s growing up fast, and time won’t wait,
So I guess I better stop writing, lest I be too late.



It’s hard not to let my frustration show,
But I don’t want anyone to know,
The struggles that go on inside my head,
That stream out in tears when I’m in bed,
There are so many choices I could take,
But I don’t want to repeat my past mistake,
So I sit silent with a smile on my face,
Wishing that somehow I could leave this place,
I let my emotions flow sometimes,
But then I bottle it up deep inside,
Just like so many times before,
I lock the windows and bolt the door,
I pull down the shade,
Because I’m afraid,
No one else ever allowed inside,
Not since the day he lied.


Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Let Him Go

I can’t,
It’s too hard,
Too difficult,
I can’t let him go.
I want,
I wish,
That he could be with me,
Wish he could see.
How much I miss him,
How much I wish,
I could kiss him,
Its time,
To let him go,
That’s what they say,
But I don’t know.
I’m fine,
That’s what I tell them,
Its okay,
That’s what I say,
No hellos,
Only good byes,
Only cons, no pros



Like hugs from behind,
That smell that’s just him,
The way I catch my breath,
When I see him 'cross the room,
His touch on my arm,
The way he holds me close,
His breath on my ear,
Like a velvet rose.
The butterflies I feel,
Whenever he is near,
The way that I know,
I’ve got nothing to fear,
The feel of his hand,
Holding onto mine,
Wishing I could stay here,
Wish to stop the time.


Saturday, April 23, 2011

Sonja's Studio

I stepped foot, for the first time in ages,
Into a large studio, full of memories, past pages,
Of times from before, when I used to dance,
Though you couldn’t tell that of me from first glance,
The walls painted purple, just like before,
The ceiling, the walls, but not the floor,
That is polished wood, shining and bright,
With the mirrors and the bars it’s a wondrous sight,
Across the room there’s a pan of chalk,
I remember it well, for it helped me walk,
Helped me spin gracefully and jump high in the air,
Like I could fly away without a care,
Maybe that’s just my imagination,
Something of my mind’s own creation,
But as I stood in the entrance, that feeling came back,
I took off my sweater, and something slipped through a crack,
I began to dance again, just like before,
My body moved in graceful tilts across the floor,
I felt free, a feeling of grace took over,
As I spun, dipped, and maneuvered,
My hair flew around me in furious flurries,
My mind was far away in a place with no worries,
But regretfully my mind came back, my worries returned,
I pulled on my sweater, and slowly I turned,
As I walked towards the door, I stopped, then slowly looked back,
I smiled slightly, leaving that room with a feeling I had long since lacked.


Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Love Me

When you tell me to go out in the dark,
I’m trusting you,
When you say to hold your hand and jump,
I’m believing in you,
When you tell me everything’s gonna be okay,
You better be right,
When I’m upset and can’t seem to cope,
I want you to hold me tight,
When I’m happy and full of life and laughter,
I want you to laugh with me,
When I fall silent and look at your lips,
I want you to kiss me,
When you’re sad and need a hug,
I hope you tell me,
When life gets tough and you feel alone,
Please trust me,
When you want to be with someone,
I hope you come to me,
When you want to love someone,
Love me.


Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Hurt to the Core

I’m crying, although I don’t know exactly why,
What is it that has made me cry?
Betrayal, I was stabbed in the back,
She was a friend with a dreadful loss of tact.
Tears in my eyes and anger in my fists,
It is true that I am thoroughly pissed.
Why am I in the wrong? What does she know?
Was she the one he tore a part, has she sunk so low?
Am I the one who’s the jerk, the farce, the liar?
The one who should be under fire?
Does she know how he treated me?
The way I felt…does she actually see?
Why can’t I explain it, why is it so hard?
Doesn’t she see I’ll be forever scarred?
I know she’s been hurt, and she’s hurting still,
But why am I the one who has to chill?
She’s attacking me with venom in her words,
Accusations that seem to me to be absurd.
I just want to swerve, move out of the way,
Smooth it over, so there’s no more to say.
But that’s not possible, no not at all,
It’s gone on too long, there’s no time to stall.
I did like him, I almost loved him,
I thought that I knew him, but the truth is grim.
He’s not who he says, nor who he plays,
He’s an actor who throws lies in scattered arrays.
She may not know this nor ever believe it,
But he was and is a jerk, even if she can’t perceive it.
I’m sorry to say it, but I can’t conceal it,
He was mean and cruel and I have to reveal it.
I wish I could go back to before when I didn’t know,
When I was innocent with a heavenly glow,
But I guess I wouldn’t be who I am now,
So I depart, with an extravagant bow.


Tuesday, April 12, 2011

The Feel of the Ocean

I breathe deeply, taking it in,
The smell of the salt, the feel of the wind,
The sky a pale blue, with wisps of a cloud,
The sound of the ocean, comforting and loud,
As I sit in the sand, I dig my toes deep,
So comforting and warm, I could almost fall asleep.
The sun’s shining bright, high in the sky,
As I wait for a sailboat to catch my eye,
There’s a sailor there, tall and refined,
With deep tanned skin and eyes so kind,
He sails through the wind on a brand new schooner,
A smile on his face full of mischief and wonder,
Across the way, riding a wave, a bright yacht sails majestically,
Its captain stands tall, with eyes bright, standing next to his beautiful wife,
Sail boats of every size pass through the water with a graceful glide,
All different colors and kinds, how, I say, will I ever decide?
The wind continues to rush over my arms, over my face, like a magic charm,
As I sit laid back on the comfortable beach, my mind wanders far out of reach,
Across the waters deep and blue, far away from the hurt and nearer to the new,
The sun shines bright and there’s a smell of salt in the air,
I reach up to fly, the wind rushing through my hair,
Then suddenly I’m back, laying in the sand, but you’re sitting there, holding my hand,
With a smile on your face and laughter in your eyes, you pick me up with a yell
Bounding towards the ocean, I scream in delight as the water washes over us,
And with that my mind cleared all the faraway places, concentrating on now,
I remember the reason, why I love you so much, and when I smile, I know you can tell.


Sunday, April 10, 2011


Every day we are apart,
I feel a little tear in my heart,
It grows each day,
But still I pray,
That once again we’ll be together,
That we’ll be that way forever,
Be bonded for life and all eternity,
And never more have that insecurity,
That makes me look each night into the sky,
Counting the shooting stars that pass me by,
Waiting for my wish to come true,
That someday I’ll be with you.


Everything Appears Right

Motions, visions, sounds, smells,
All come clashing down in an overwhelming title wave,
Everything seems blurred, unreal, almost like a dream,
Emotions flowing, struggle to stay in control, unable to save.
Memories flash across my mind, your face, your voice, you,
The things you say, the way you say it, how you were with me,
Inseparable, or so it seems, you and me, never again,

We’d talk, or stay silent; everything appears right, in perfect harmony.



It was awkward and strange,
Seeing you there,
It’s been awhile since we talked,
I tried not to stare.
I avoided eye contact,
And looking your way,
I hope I wasn’t rude,
I had nothing to say.
The silence was strained,
Tension in the air,
Wishing I hadn’t said no,
Wishing I didn’t have to care.
I hate emotions,
So stupid and thoughtless,
Why not get rid of them,
They do nothing for us.
They create drama,
And play with your mind,
Why don’t we dump them,
And leave them behind.
They can sit there alone,
In a depressing hole,
Bottled up and alone,
Deep within my soul.
People say it’s unhealthy,
Not good to do,
But I’ll do it anyway,
So I won’t feel pain seeing you.
Alas, it’s not possible,
It’s still awkward and strange,
Even if it's for the better,

My view point won't change...


All I Really Want is You

Every time I see your face,
Every time I hear your voice,
I wanna hold you close,
Wanna take back my choice.
But I know I can’t,
Even if I wanted to,
I have to keep my word,
I have to follow through.
Why did I do that to you?
Why would I do it to me?
Why is God saying no?
Or am I not listening?
Wish I could be unconfused,
Wish I could know what to do,
I wish for many things,
But all I really want is you.
All I really want is you.


I’ll talk to you,
I’ll even listen,
I’ll give you what you want,
Or what you think you need.
I’ll be there for you when you cry,
When your eyes glisten.
But I’ll keep you pinned down,
I’ll never let you fly.
You’ll be my comforter,
For when time passes by.
When I need you most,
Until the day you die.,
You're my prisoner,
You'll always be with me,
You can't seem to escape,
As far as you can see.


It’s so hard to imagine you ever getting mad,
You sit there so peaceful, so tranquil, and silent.
Your face perfection, no emotion is shown,
Like a manikin, immobile, not prone to be violent.
Every once in a while I catch a glimpse of something,
But soon as I see it, in a flash, it’s gone, vanished from sight.
Your face confuses me, a mixture of serious and happy
So delicate, and fragile, so puzzling…maybe it was just the light.
But, looking back, carefully, I see you staring straight at me,
I quick look away, not wanting to seem rude or intrusive, as if I don't belong,
Looking back once more, my eyes meet yours, so sad…so lonely…so alone,
The emotions, so clear, staring into your eyes, no breath in my lungs, how could I be so wrong?


Monday, February 21, 2011

The Second Coming

You, me, us, together,
Life seems to go on forever,
People, places, houses, things,
All we see is objects not human beings,
Teens texting and Facebook users,
Youtube bloggers or like button abusers,
Fantasy, fiction, fake, unreal,
Lies the government conceals,
Trees that grow or get chopped down,
Falling freely to the ground,
Blue skies covered all in grey,
24 hours to a day,
Babies crying or peacefully sleeping,
Ovens, microwaves, monitors beeping,
Somebody weeping, Liberty’s sleeping, freedom living, but no one’s giving.
Siblings fighting, government lying, people sighing, no use crying,
Smoking, drinking, partying, sinning,
The world is falling, no one’s winning,
Cities flooded or covered in snow,
What’s going on? No one knows.
Who is no one? The people, the mob, the crowd, the mass,
Things in scriptures come to pass
All the wicked and sinners will have to pay,
The Second Coming is on its way

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

My Beautiful Girl

Look at my beautiful girl,
Look at her tiny toes!
Look at my beautiful girl,
Look at her cute little clothes!
Look at my beautiful girl,
At her sparkling blue eyes!
Look at my beautiful girl,
At how time flies!
Look at my beautiful girl,
Growing up so fast!
Look at my beautiful girl,
Why doesn’t this last?
Look at my beautiful girl,
With her chubby cheeks,
Look at my beautiful girl,
As she learns to speak!
Look at my beautiful girl,
Who giggles and smiles galore,
Look at my beautiful girl,
Who’s crawling all over the floor!
Look at my beautiful girl,
Slowly growing up,
Look at my beautiful girl,
Now drinking out of a cup!
Look at my beautiful girl,
Learning how to read!
Look at my beautiful girl,
Learning how to lead!
Look at my beautiful girl,
Lying on the bed,
Still small, angelic,
With a halo round her head.


Monday, February 14, 2011


You say you’ll always love me,
That I have your heart,
You say you’ll never leave me,
That we’ll never be apart.
I said it wouldn’t work,
Don’t you understand?
Don’t reel me in again,
Don’t reach out your hand.
You know of course I’ll take it,
As you pull me bit by bit,
You teach me commands,
Speak, roll-over, sit.
I cover my ears with my hands,
And hide my face in my arms,
Hiding from your magic spell,
From your irresistible charm.
As much as I care for you,
It’s only as a friend,
You say you’ll always love me,
Your heart will never mend.
Gosh, you know you’re sweet,
And lovable to boot,
But I am not in love with you,
That’s the irrefutable truth.


Singles Awareness Day

It’s Valentine’s Day,
Singles Awareness Day,
It’s today, Monday,
But I’m still happy.
How odd,
Aren’t I supposed to be sad?
Well I’m not,
Why am I not mad?
Aren’t I supposed to curse V-day?
Or stab baby Cupid?
Take away his bow,
Because I feel stupid?
This is rather weird,
A new sensation,
One of contentment,
Or exhilaration.
V-day can’t pull me down,
And make me sad,
No romance is needed,
To make ME glad!


Sunday, February 13, 2011

Once Again

Once again,
The tears are falling,
I’m so confused,
My heart is calling.
Why pick me?
Can’t we just be friends?
My feelings torn,
This always happens.
They fall for me,
Or I fall for them,
But it never works,

Not in the end.


Saturday, February 12, 2011

Letter From Him

A letter,
Just lying there,
I can only stare.
My heart pumps,
My face turns red,
It’s for me,
Wonder what he said.
Hands fumble,
I open the seal,
His writing,
A warmth I can feel.
He asks me,
If I am okay,
How am I doing?
What to say…
Short and sweet,
The letter ends,
He said “Yours always”,
*Reads again*


Friday, February 11, 2011

World War II

Once again,
We’ve gone to war,
Resorted to violence,
But what for?
For the people?
For fame or glory or greed?
How feeble
It’s so hard,
To watch them go,
The tough old men and young boys,
They struck low
The Germans,
And Japanese,
Taking our hard working men,
As they please
Now woman,
No longer home,
Are working for food and child,
All alone


Tuesday, February 8, 2011


So many choices
Leading in different directions
So many voices
Giving diverse expectations
Should I pursue school?
Go to college, get a degree?
Or, should I stay home?
Not knowing what or who I could be?
And, when said that way,
The choice ought to, HAS to be clear,
But what can I say?
It isn’t, I’m still full of fear
It requires so much:
Dedication and concentration
Things I barely touch
Not to mention the motivation
It gets harder still
When people push me down with scorn,
And whatever will,
I once possessed is sadly worn
So many voices,
Giving different expectations,
So many choices,
But I’ll give myself directions

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

I'm a Leader

I've got my problems and my challenges,
I've got a mind and have formed opinions,
I take responsibility for me,
I do laundry and watch little minions.

I do my school like any other kid,
Often reluctant, but I get it done!
I can be serious and snazzy too,
Because what girl doesn't want to have fun?

But soemtimes people underestimate,
The power and intelligence I have,
They see "teen" in my age, so they assume,
I'm not worth their time, and they start to laugh

But guess what world? You may think this strange,
But I'm a leader, and this world I'll change!


When Love Strikes

When the mind and heart are tangled,
Fighting love and logic,
When ones throat feels tight and strangled,
Leaving one’s middle sick
When tears are tempted down pale cheeks,
Making red lips tremble,
When legs stand immobile and weak,
No one moves a muscle
When two hearts or a luckless one,
Fall deeply into love,
When their soul-mate’s finally won,
They’ll thank heaven above
Then life’s perception starts to change,
The pieces seem to fall apart,
Like a puzzle we rearrange,
Giving us a new start


Monday, January 31, 2011

The Scent of Heaven

Through the years I’ve come to realize one invaluable truth. The world is a magnificent place. When I look out my window, my mind spins at the beauty I see. The morning is my all-time favorite, when the sun is just rising. The sky in the east is dyed pink, purple, blue, orange, yellow. The tips of the trees turn a rosy red, making it seem like they’re alive and filled with energy. The sun rises higher in the sky, splashing across the gorgeous mountains surrounding my house. The leaves on the trees glitter, waving in the wind, almost as if they’re prized jewels on the slender hand of a woman. They wave slowly, without an intention or purpose in mind. They do it just because. But, the beauty of the world is not only seen. You can hear, smell, and even feel it. If I were to open my window at the same time the sun was rising, I would hear the sounds of the world around me awakening. I’d hear the songs of a thousand different birds, waking up and preparing for another day. I’d hear the sound of the water from the spring trickling down the steep hill just down the road. Not only that, I would hear the sound of the wind swishing through the tree branches, feel it’s cool freshness on my face and arms, smell the scent of freshly blooming flowers that it carries for the pleasure of all. I would feel the warmth of the sun, splashing its golden light onto my outstretched hands. In a rush of delight I would grab a jacket, pull on my shoes, and go for a stroll in the newly awakened woods. I would pass by the stream; run my fingers in the cool liquid. I would touch the wild flowers, blooming in beautiful arrays by the stream, nourished by the untainted waters. Their petals feel like velvet on my skin, their scent like heaven. The clear morning sky brings the promise of a new day, a chance for new things, new experiences, and new opportunities to learn. It’s a chance to refresh your mind, and your heart.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

I Miss You

I feel lost,
No one to cling to,
I feel lost,
No one to sing to.
My mind is lost,
I am so confused,
My mind is lost,
I’ve been so misused.
My heart would race,
Every time I’d text you,
My heart would race,
Every time I’d see you.
My imagination runs,
I really miss you,
My imagination runs,
Wish I could kiss you.
My life goes on,
You’ll never come back,
My life goes on,
But it’s still off track.


Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Stretched to the Limit

My hair is curled,
My clothes are clean,
My face is smiling,
My misery is unseen.

In reality,
I haven't showered in days,
Cuz when she asksfor something,
I'm the one who obeys.

I don't have time for me,
Whenever she's around,
She gets a headache,
From anything and any sound.

I wash babies,
And fold all the clothes,
My outward appearance shows indifference,
I'm the only one who knows.

My pain is growing,
Gnawing me from inside,
I can't take it anymore,
There's nowhere to hide.

An outburst of anger,
Of hatred...and fear,
She doesn't understand,
Or she doesn't really care.

I hush children,
And occupy their minds,
When they can't sleep,
I sing lullabies.

She lays in her bed,
Sick with a tummy ache,
While I bustle around,
Looking for a dinner to make.

My head is bursting,
My hair went flat,
I threw up twice,
But she'll never know that.

No sympathy would come,
Just accusations and reprimands,
I must bow down to the Queen,
And do as she cammands.

I scrub toilets and change diapers,
I make beds and skip showers,
I rub her feet instead of doing school,
I even tried giving her some flowers.

I yell at children,
To stop annoying her,
That don't understand,
There's no use toying with her.


Saturday, January 1, 2011


The first ship,
Sailed on the sea,
Carrying with it,
A large company.

They landed on Plymouth,
And signed a compact,
For God and for King,
They made this contract.

Their burdens were heavy,
Their lives were hard,
They were visionaries,
To none are compared.

Their lineage leads,
To the making of,
A nation and country,
That we all know and love.

Men fought for it,
Men died in battle,
They sacrificed their lives,
Generals sit in their saddle.

America the beautiful,
America the sweet,
Home of the brave,
Who died on their feet.

America was made,
By the hands of the people,
And two lanterns lit,
In the churches steeple.

George Washignton,
Patrick Henry,
John Adams,
and John Quincey.

Abraham Lincoln,
and Robert E. Lee,
These are the people,
Who made this country.


Little Boys

They're bouncing all around,
They're making lots of noises,
They're jumping up and down,
Their cheeks are red as roses.

They're hitting a balloon,
With plates taped to rulers,
Over a red piece of string,
They must be homeschoolers.

A shout of Boo!
A scream of no!
Running this way,
All around they go!

They're wild and crazy,
They stumble over toys,
I think you might've guessed,
"They" are little boys.



My stomach is tight,
My throat is dry,
My fingers are twitching,
I let out a sigh.

My head is pounding,
My face is red,
My lips are moving,
My tongue feels like lead.

I feel a bit faint,
My face is paling,
I need to lay down,
My heart is failing.

I'm a bit better now,
Just a little bit so,
So I stand up,
And now you know.



A small flower,
Purple in hue,
With yellow seeds,
Isn't it beau'?

Bees are buzzing,
Around our heads,
Flying towards,
The flower beds.

Crickets chirping,
Around the clock,
Ants are crawling,
Around the block.

The birds are flying,
In tight formation,
The sun is shining,
I'll need sun tan lotion.


A Still Pond

A still pond,
Black as night,
The stars shining,
With a small light.

Reflecting my face,
Pale in the moon's might,
My eyes flashing,
A wondrous sight.

The pond's blue face,
Ripples from a drop of rain,
Disturbing the light,
Driving me insane.

The pond is still there,
Peaceful once again,
The moon shining bright,
This is the end.



Something is coming,
Something is near,
I feel like running,
So it can be here.

Somethign exciting,
Something I feel,
A tingle in my stomach,
Maybe a meal?

No, more important,
I can't seem to find,
A secret that's kept,
From my great little mind.

Just a peek,
I want to know,
I almost squeak,
I see a bow!

A brightly rapped box,
A card that pays,
I completely forgot,


Why Becca Barnes,
She's fantastic,
She loves to play,
And be sarcastic.

She's got blonde hair,
And sparkling blue eyes,
She's short and thin,
Despite how much she loves pies.

A better friend,
You couldn't get,
No way no how,
So don't forget.

That Becca Barnes,
Is one of a kind,
And she's the brightest star,
That ever did shine!


(Tried to put something about celery in there, but it didn't work ;)


She has red hair,
And freckles on her nose,
She's got pearly teeth,
And is pretty as a rose.

She is a bit tall,
But it fits her just right,
She's as graceful as a swan,
When she dances in the light.

Her voice is like a bell,
When she sings holiday carols,
She's my bestest friend,
No matter what quarrels!


Young Love

A red couch,
A brown pillow,
A comfy quilt,
Sweet, I know.

They sit right there,
They whisper low,
Holding hands,
Time moving slow.

Smiling faces,
Short giggles,
A quiet laugh,
Small chills.

A young gentleman,
A little lady,
His name is Christopher,
Her name is Ashley.

Stars sparkle,
She glows so bright,
Compliments from him,
All this night.

And here we leave them,
These lovers two,
They need some privacey,
Wouldn't you?


Civil War

Guns fire,
Confusion everywhere,
Smoke billows high,
The red guns flare.

It blinds the men,
Who are shooting,
Men diving for cover,
Their muskets need loading.

Generals shouting,
Horses neighing,
Cannons blowing,
Dead men laying.

They're piled high,
These men who fought,
Bravey they fell,
Though cruelly rought.

Confusion dies down,
The battle is won and lost,
Woman wear black gowns.

The war is done,
Many men died,
And all agree,
It was a tough ride.


A Sweet Thing

A little crush,
That's what it is,
She's sitting there,
What is this?

He's wearing a black shirt,
I don't like to stare,
But I can't help it,
I want to squeeze him like a Teddy Bear.

She's bad at Ninja,
She gets out every time,
But that's okay,
She's so divine.

My mind is racing,
He knows so much,
My hand is tingling,
At his touch.

-Bri (Co written with Lauren Hopkinson)

Ask, and Ye Shall Recieve

I stare at the sky,
The stars shining bright,
I sit and wonder,
If I am in the right.

I sit and think,
Does He know who I am?
As I wonder on,
I think of a plan.

I get down to my knees,
My arms folded close to me,
I speak softly and ask,
Who should I be?

The answer is here,
In this great book,
Written with care,
All I need to do, is look.


Just for Fun

(This isn't finished yet, this is all I have)

A wicked thought,
Passes over me,
A brilliant plan,
To cream.

It may seem weird,
Or even dumb,
That's fine with me,
You won't get some.

-Bri :)

Death Town

Snow flying through the air,
Trees swaying heavy with ice,
Air cold and crisp,
Grey and cloudy skies.

People passing,
Their faces blurred,
Blank and pale,
Eyes dark and unsure.

Buildings lining the roads,
Tall and daunting,
Crows flying overhead,
A place so haunting.

Fences closing in,
Blocking out all good,
This place is scary,
A creepy neighborhood.


Broken Heart

He left,
He's gone,
Not here,
I knew all along.

He was my one,
He was the only,
My other half,
Now I'm so lonely.

He was so sweet,
So full of love,
But I'm cast aside,
Like an old glove.

I guess I was wrong,
He didn't love me,
So I'll move on,
Feeling very sorry.



My stomach is turning,
My eyes are wide,
I smile warmly,
When he's at my side.

I often think,
That I'm in love,
It makes me feel,
much like a dove.

But I know,
The feelings fake,
Although I think,
I see a wedding cake.

Though I wish,
I could marry him,
I know as well,
The prospects dim.


What is Love?

What is love?
It's the birds song,
In early spring,
It's the exchanging of,
Two silver wedding rings.

What is love?
Its a hug and a kiss,
Exchanged between lovers,
Or given to a child,
From affectionate mothers.

What is love?
It'sa good book,
Or a beautiful picture,
It's reading a poem,
Or a comforting scripture.

What is love?
It's God in the sky,
It's family and friends,
It's staying together,
Until the very end.

What is love?
So hard to define,
And yet it is here,
Love you will find,



When I see your name,
On the screen of my cell,
My heart pumps faster,
Everyone can tell.

I talk to you all the time,
About nothing in particular,
For hours on end,
Or a very large integer.

Your mannerisms make me smile,
The way you are with kids,
You mess around all the time,
The way you alwayse forgive.

I am happy when I talk to you,
And sad when I can't,
When I tell you something,
You always understand.

Sometimes I wish,
You'd be interested in me,
But too often I think,
That it just can't be.



For Bert.

There's a gap,
A gaping hole,
An absence,
Sadness beyond control.

A blurry face,
Smiling sweetly,
An echoed laugh,
Flowing over me.

My eyes mist,
Tears falling freely,
Hands shaking,
Loose control completely.

She left me here,
Not thinking I would cry,
Why did she have to leave?
Why did she have to die?

I AM crying,
My eyes are puffy and red,
My ears are pounding,
So many things I should've said.

A hello in the hallway,
As we passed eachother there,
A smile or a hug,
Just to show I care.

Regretting all the times,
I could've said hi,
Never imagining,
I'd never say good bye.

I'll miss you always,
And remember how you sneezed,
How you always made me smile,
How you always believed.

In the end you made a choice,
To join God sooner than most,
But no judgement comes from me,
As you join the Holy Host.

There's still a gap,
A gaping hole,
But Bert was a wonderful person,
Who had a beautiful soul.


Wind Chimes

The air is full of windchimes,
Chiming in the air,
With musical little tinkles,
No sound could ever compare.

The chimes hang from trees,
Surrounding the small beach,
Slowly we walk forward,
Our lives seeming complete,

The wind floats softly over me,
Across my face and arms,
Across my hand entwined with his,
Sending off silent alarms.

My skin feels electrified,
As we walk hand in hand,
His whisper in my ear,
Our feet in the sand,

His face lights up,
With a mischevious light,
As he pulls me toward the water,
I don't put up a fight.

The sand between my toes,
The wind in my hair,
The water climbing my legs,
The music in the air,

The sun set splashes over us,
As the water swirls round,
Our eyes lock,
Not making a sound.

I catch my breath,
Stare deeply in his eyes,
The moment perfect,
No words can describe

He leans towards me,
My heart skips a beat,
My eyes closed tight,
Our lips meet.


American Soldier

The night is cold,
The air is still,
All are nervous,
We’ll fight to kill.

The moon is shining,
My arms are tense,
They are coming,
This is my chance.

A chance for honor?
Or a chance for glory?
No, for love and for happiness,
For Life, and for Liberty.

I see their faces,
Their stony eyes,
We’re fighting to win,
Or die otherwise.

I’m at the front,
I take my aim,
My gun fires loud,
This isn’t a game.

The noise is loud,
Cannons booming,
Men shouting,
Demons pursuing.

Retreating fast,
I stumble and slip,
My arms are flailing,
I feel slightly sick.

My heart races,
My stomachs twirling,
I hit the ground,
I feel like hurling.

My hands are trampled,
I lay flat on my back,
Men stumble past me,
I hear a loud crack.

Pain surges over me,
My eyes start to water,
I try to stand up,
Wishing for Father.

My head hurts,
My hearts pounding,
A bullet strikes me,
My eyes start clouding.

The pain is unbearable,
It hurts too much,
I collapse to the ground,
In need of a crutch.

I lay there quietly,
As it begins to snow,
I begin to pray,
For what, I don’t know.

The dark enfolds me,
Oh, sweet peace,
The pain is receding,
It begins to cease.


12th Day of Christmas

12 drummers drumming,
Would be a wondrous sight,
But they were already booked,
at the Anchorage Symphony tonight

So we brought some drumsticks,
That taste fantastic,
And believe us,
We aren’t being sarcastic.

We all wish for presents,
We all wish for snow,
We wish for lots of money,
But do we really know?

Christmas is a season,
To celebrate with cheer,
The birth of Jesus Christ,
It becomes so clear.

The true meaning of Christmas,
Of family and friends,
Is that we stick together,
Even after the season ends.

So we bid you farewell,
And a Merry Christmas,
And hope that you will,
Always remember us.


Diamonds in the Sky

I walk along a lonely path,
My face blank and with regret,
I realize just how much I've missed,
But indeed it isn't hopeless yet.

If I could do,
What I forgot,
If I would do,
I might have a shot.

A shot at reconciling,
Who I'd offended,
A chance to appreciate,
WHo once condescended.

To look at the trees,
And smell the flowers,
To help and hold up,
The noble cowards.

I would smile and wave,
At those who passed,
I would sing and dance,
To add contrast.

The lives of others,
Would be touched by me,
The lives of others,
Would change you see.

If I would be willing,
To see the light,
If I were willing,
To hold them tight.

Would you come back,
And keep me safe?
Would you come back,
And stay for my sake?

I felt so lonely,
But the path was clear,
I knew all along,
But was full of fear.

The sky before,
Was dark and dreary,
But now I see,
The diamonds quite clearly.

They are guidance,
To those who are lost,
Like Guardian Angels,
With voices soft.

The Guardian Angels,
Shone clear and bright,
They sat and waited,
To help me through the night,

Their love for me,
Touched my heart,
Gave me an idea,
On where to start.

The Angels gave me a goal,
To change a random person's life,
Feeding with love their delicate soul,
To end all their misery and strife.

Thank you Diamond Angels,
Of the sky,
To whom I am indebted,
Until I die.



Words that sting,
Feeling hated,
Taking it personally.

No one loves me,
No one cares,
My heart is hurt,
I turn to prayers.

Why don't they love me?
Why critisize?
They don't see the hurt,
Lingering in my eyes.

My faith in them,
Is low and leaving,
My heart tells me,
To stop believing.

They yell at me,
Or just imply,
How I disappoint them,
It makes me cry.

Life is confusing,
Saying different things,
One day a peasant,
The next a King.

Some messages are good,
Uplifting and true,
Others give distress and worry,
Always depressing you.

But one thing I know,
And will always believe,
I'll pull on my armor,
And place my sword in it's sheath.

The armor will protect me,
From feeling too depressed,
I won't bottle it up deep inside,
I won't be surpressed.

My heart will soar,
Whether they like it or not,
They won't know who I am,
I still have a shot.

I am loved,
Although sometimes I don't feel it,
People don't realize,
Because I conceal it.

They don't realize I hurt,
Or how much I cry,
Just yell and scream,
Wish I could say good bye.

Sometimes we just have to forgive,
Even though it's hard to forget,
It's easier to start over again,
Than to be forever upset.